Friday morning we arose and prepared to resume our journey
for Bonfouca, twenty-three miles away. The man walked in very unceremoniously
to get corn from the armoir as we got up, throwing open the windows and
performing sundry little offices usually reserved for femmes-de-chambre; but
with that exception everything went on very well. Breakfast being a luxury not
to be procured, we got into the carriages before sunrise, and left this
romantic abode of dogs and contentment. Again our road lay through piney woods,
so much like that from Hammond to Ponchatoula that involuntarily I found myself
looking through the window to see if Mr. Halsey was there. It lacked only his
presence to make the scene all in all the same. But alas! this time the driver
picked me wild flowers, and brought us haws. Mr. Halsey, in blissful ignorance
of our departure, was many and many a mile away. The drive was not half as
amusing. The horse would not suffer any one except Miriam to drive, and at last
refused to move until the driver got down and ran along by the carriage. Every
time the poor boy attempted to occupy his seat, the obstinate animal would come
to a dead stop and refuse to go until he dismounted again. I am sure that he
walked nineteen miles out of the twenty-three, out of complaisance to the
ungrateful brute. All equally fatigued and warm, we reached this place about
twelve o'clock. Mrs. Bull had arrived before us; and as the carriage stopped,
her girl Delia came to the gate the personification of despair, crying, “You
can't get out, ladies. They say we can't stop here; we must go right back.” The
panic which ensued is indescribable. Go back when we were almost at our
journey's end, after all the money we had spent, the fatigue we had undergone,
to be turned back all the way to Clinton, perhaps! “With my sick babies!” cried
Mrs. Ivy. “With my sick child!” cried mother. “Never! You may turn me out of
your house, but we will die in the woods first! To go back is to kill my
daughter and these babies!” This was to the overseer who came to the carriage. “Madam,
I have orders to allow no one to pass who has not written permission.
Lieutenant Worthington sent the order two days ago; and I am liable to
imprisonment if I harbor those who have no passport,” the man explained. “But
we have General Gardiner's order,” I expostulated. “Then you shall certainly
pass; but these ladies cannot. I can't turn you away, though; you shall all
come in and stay until something can be determined on.”
This much granted was an unlooked-for blessing. He showed us
the way to a large unfurnished house, one room of which contained a bed with
one naked mattress, which was to be our apartment. Mrs. Bull sat down in a
calm, dignified state of despair; little Mrs. Ivy dissolved in tears; we all
felt equally disconsolate; the prospect of getting off was not so pleasant when
we thought we should be obliged to leave them behind. Our common misfortunes
had endeared us to each other, strangers as we were a week ago. So we all
lamented together, a perfect jérémiade
of despair. The overseer is very tenderhearted; he condoled, comforted, and
finally determined that if there was any way of getting them off, they should
go. A glimpse of sunshine returned to our lowering sky, and cheerfulness
reigned once more, to be violently dethroned some hours later. Three of the
Madisonville pickets were announced approaching the house. Of course, they were
coming after us! Oh, that vile Mr. Worthington! We always did hate him!
There was such a sneaky look about him. Hypocrite! we always felt we should
hate him! Oh, the wretch! “I won't go back!” cried mother. “I shall not,” said
quiet Mrs. Bull. “He shall pay my expenses if he insists on taking me back!”
exclaimed Mrs. Ivy. “Spent all my money! Mrs. Bull, you have none to lend me,
remember, and Mrs. Morgan shan't I Oh, that Worthington! Let's make him
pay for all!” We smothered our laughter to sit trembling within as the pickets
stepped on the gallery. I believe we commenced praying. Just think! Thus far,
our journey has cost mother two hundred and twenty dollars. It would cost the
same to get back to blessed Clinton, and fancy our spending that sum to settle
there again! Besides, we gave away all our clothes to our suffering friends;
and what would we do there now?
After half an hour of painful suspense, we discovered that
it would have been as well to spare poor Mr. Worthington; for the pickets were
not after us, but had come to escort Mrs. R–––, a woman who was taking the body
of her son, who was killed at Murfreesboro, to the city for interment. Poor
woman! she rode all this distance sitting on her child's coffin. Her husband
was one of those who with B––– stole that large sum of money from father which
came so near ruining him. She speaks of her husband as of a departed saint. I
dare say she believes him innocent of the theft in spite of his public
confession. The grave has wiped out even the disgrace of the penitentiary where
he expiated his offense. . . . When I told Tiche who the woman was, she clasped
her hands, saying, “The Lord is good! Years and years master suffered while she
grew rich, and now her time comes! The Lord don't forget!” I can't feel
that way. It is well for the narrow-minded to look for God's judgment on us for
our sins; but mine is a more liberal faith. God afflicted her for some wise
purpose; but if I thought it was to avenge father, I should be afraid of her.
As it is, I can be sorry, oh, so sorry for her!
As usual I find myself taken care of at the expense of the
others. There are but two bars on the place; one, the overseer said, should be
for me, the other for the children. Sheets were scarce, covers scarcer still.
Tired of being spoiled in this way, I insisted on being allowed to sleep on a
mattress on the floor, after a vigorous skirmish with mother and Miriam, in
which I came off victorious. For a bar, I impressed Miriam's grenadine dress,
which she fastened to the doorknob and let fall over me à la Victoria tester arrangement. To my share fell a
double blanket, which, as Tiche had no cover, I unfolded, and as she used the
foot of my bed for a pillow, gave her the other end of it, thus (tell it not in
Yankeeland, for it will never be credited) actually sleeping under the same
bedclothes with our black, shiny negro nurse! We are grateful, though, even for
these discomforts; it might have been so much worse! Indeed, I fear that our
fellow travelers do not fare as well. Those who have sheets have no bars; those
who have blankets have no sheets; and one woman who has recently joined us has
nothing except a mattress which is to do the duty of all three. But then, we
got bread! Real, pure, wheat bread! And coffee! None of your potato, burnt
sugar, and parched corn abomination, but the unadulterated berry! I can't enjoy
it fully, though; every mouthful is cloyed with the recollection that Lilly and
her children have none.
As usual, as Mrs. Greyson says, the flowers follow us;
yesterday I received three bouquets, and Miriam got one too. In this out-of-the-way
place such offerings are unexpected; and these were doubly gratifying coming
from people one is not accustomed to receiving them from. For instance, the
first was from the overseer, the second from a servant, and the third from a
poor boy for whom we have subscribed to pay his passage to the city.
SOURCE: Sarah Morgan Dawson, A Confederate Girl's
Diary, p. 372-7
