Raleigh,
April 15, 1865.
To-day makes
four years soldiering for me. It is a terrible waste of time for me who have to
make a start in life yet, and I expect unfits me for civil life. I have almost
a dread of being a citizen, of trying to be sharp, and trying to make money. I
don't think I dread the work. I don't remember of shirking any work I ever attempted,
but I am sure that civil life will go sorely against the grain for a time.
Citizens are not like soldiers, and I like soldier ways much the best. We were
to have moved out this morning but did not. Logan went out with our 4th
division, report says, to confer with Johnston. Big rumors going that our
campaign is over, and that Johnston's men are going home. We have been having
heavy showers during the day, but the boys feel so good over the prospect ahead
that they raise the most tremendous cheers right in the midst of the hardest
rains. We think Johnston is in as tight a place as Lee was, and if he don't
surrender we will go for him in a way that will astonish him. We consider our
cause gained and are searching each other's records to see who was ever
doubtful of success. I don't remember at any time of being despondent over the
war or being doubtful of the issue. Was I? I did think the war might last for
years yet, but take that back. I have not been in town since we came through,
and think no one from the brigade has. Curiosity over captured cities is
"old.”
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