A day to be forever remembered, — as luck would have it, we
rose very early, and had breakfast sooner than usual, it would seem for the
express design of becoming famished before dinner. I picked up some of my
letters and papers and set them where I could find them whenever we were ready
to go to Greenwell, burning a pile of trash and leaving a quantity equally
worthless, which were of no value even to myself except from association. I was
packing up my traveling-desk with all Harry's little articles that were left to
me, and other things, and I was saying to myself that my affairs were in such
confusion that if obliged to run unexpectedly I would not know what to save,
when I heard Lilly's voice downstairs, crying as she ran in — she had been out
shopping — “Mr. Castle has killed a Federal officer on a ship, and they are
going to shell —” Bang! went a cannon at the word, and that was all our
warning.
Mother had just come in, and was lying down, but sprang to
her feet and added her screams to the general confusion. Miriam, who had been
searching the libraries, ran up to quiet her; Lilly gathered her children,
crying hysterically all the time, and ran to the front door with them as they
were; Lucy saved the baby, naked as she took her from her bath, only throwing a
quilt over her. I bethought me of my “running-bag” which I had used on a former
case, and in a moment my few precious articles were secured under my hoops, and
with a sunbonnet on, I stood ready for anything.
The firing still continued; they must have fired half a
dozen times before we could coax mother off. What awful screams! I had hoped
never to hear them again, after Harry died. Charlie had gone to Greenwell
before daybreak, to prepare the house, so we four women, with all those
children and servants, were left to save ourselves. I did not forget my poor
little Jimmy; I caught up his cage and ran down. Just at this moment mother
recovered enough to insist on saving father's papers — which was impossible, as
she had not an idea of where the important ones were. I heard Miriam plead,
argue, insist, command her to run; Lilly shriek, and cry she should go; the
children screaming within; women running by with out, crying and moaning; but I
could not join in. I was going I knew not where; it was impossible to take my
bird, for even if I could carry him, he would starve. So I took him out of his
cage, kissed his little yellow head, and tossed him up. He gave one feeble
little chirp as if to ascertain where to go, and then for the first and last
time I cried, laying my head against the gate-post, and with my eyes too dim to
see him. Oh, how it hurt me to lose my little bird, one Jimmy had given me,
too!
But the next minute we were all off, in safety. A square
from home, I discovered that boy shoes were not the most comfortable things to
run in, so I ran back, in spite of cannonading, entreaties, etc., to get
another pair. I got home, found an old pair that were by no means respectable,
which I seized without hesitation; and being perfectly at ease, thought it
would be so nice to save at least Miriam's and my tooth-brushes, so slipped them
in my corsets. These in, of course we must have a comb — that was added — then
how could we stand the sun without starch to cool our faces? This included the
powder-bag; then I must save that beautiful lace collar; and my hair was
tumbling down, so in went the tucking-comb and hair-pins with the rest; until,
if there had been any one to speculate, they would have wondered a long while
at the singular appearance of a girl who is considered as very slight, usually.
By this time, Miriam, alarmed for me, returned to find me, though urged by Dr.
Castleton not to risk her life by attempting it, and we started off together.
We had hardly gone a square when we decided to return a
second time, and get at least a few articles for the children and ourselves,
who had nothing except what we happened to have on when the shelling commenced.
She picked up any little things and threw them to me, while I filled a
pillow-case jerked from the bed, and placed my powder and brushes in it with
the rest. Before we could leave, mother, alarmed for us both, came to find us,
with Tiche.1 All this time they had been shelling, but there was
quite a lull when she got there, and she commenced picking up father's papers,
vowing all the time she would not leave. Every argument we could use was of no
avail, and we were desperate as to what course to pursue, when the shelling
recommenced in a few minutes. Then mother recommenced her screaming and was
ready to fly anywhere; and holding her box of papers, with a faint idea of
saving something, she picked up two dirty underskirts and an old cloak.
By dint of Miriam's vehement appeals, aided by a great deal
of pulling, we got her down to the back door. We had given our pillow-case to
Tiche, who added another bundle and all our silver to it, and had already
departed.
As we stood in the door, four or five shells sailed over our
heads at the same time, seeming to make a perfect corkscrew of the air, — for
it sounded as though it went in circles. Miriam cried, "Never mind the
door!" mother screamed anew, and I stayed behind to lock the door, with
this new music in my ears. We reached the back gate, that was on the street,
when another shell passed us, and Miriam jumped behind the fence for
protection. We had only gone half a square when Dr. Castleton begged us to take
another street, as they were firing up that one. We took his advice, but found
our new street worse than the old, for the shells seemed to whistle their
strange songs with redoubled vigor. The height of my ambition was now attained.
I had heard Jimmy laugh about the singular sensation produced by the rifled
balls spinning around one's head; and here I heard the same peculiar sound, ran
the same risk, and was equal to the rest of the boys, for was I not in the
midst of flying shells, in the middle of a bombardment? I think I was rather
proud of it.
We were alone on the road, — all had run away before, — so I
thought it was for our especial entertainment, this little affair. I cannot
remember how long it lasted; I am positive that the clock struck ten before I
left home, but I had been up so long, I know not what time it began, though I
am told it was between eight and nine. We passed the graveyard, we did not even
stop, and about a mile and a half from home, when mother was perfectly
exhausted with fatigue and unable to proceed farther, we met a gentleman in a
buggy who kindly took charge of her and our bundles. We could have walked miles
beyond, then, for as soon as she was safe we felt as though a load had been
removed from our shoulders; and after exhorting her not to be uneasy about us,
and reminding her we had a pistol and a dagger, — I had secured a “for true”
one the day before, fortunately, — she drove off, and we trudged on alone, the
only people in sight on foot, though occasionally carriages and buggies would
pass, going towards town. One party of gentlemen put their heads out and one
said, “There are Judge Morgan's daughters sitting by the road!” —but I observed
he did not offer them the slightest assistance. However, others were very kind.
One I never heard of had volunteered to go for us, and bring us to mother, when
she was uneasy about our staying so long, when we went home to get clothes. We
heard him ring and knock, but, thinking it must be next door, paid no
attention, so he went back and mother came herself.
We were two miles away when we sat down by the road to rest,
and have a laugh. Here were two women married, and able to take care of
themselves, flying for their lives and leaving two lorn girls alone on the
road, to protect each other! To be sure, neither could help us, and one was not
able to walk, and the other had helpless children to save; but it was so funny
when we talked about it, and thought how sorry both would be when they regained
their reason! While we were yet resting, we saw a cart coming, and, giving up
all idea of our walking to Greenwell, called the people to stop. To our great
delight, it proved to be a cart loaded with Mrs. Brunot's affairs, driven by
two of her negroes, who kindly took us up with them, on the top of their
luggage; and we drove off in state, as much pleased at riding in that novel
place as though we were accustomed to ride in wheelbarrows. Miriam was in a
hollow between a flour barrel and a mattress; and I at the end, astride, I am
afraid, of a tremendous bundle, for my face was down the road and each foot
resting very near the sides of the cart. I tried to make a better arrangement,
though, after a while. These servants were good enough to lend us their
umbrella, without which I am afraid we would have suffered severely, for the
day was intensely warm. Three miles from town we began to overtake the
fugitives. Hundreds of women and children were walking along, some bareheaded,
and in all costumes. Little girls of twelve and fourteen were wandering on
alone. I called to one I knew, and asked where her mother was; she didn't know;
she would walk on until she found out. It seems her mother lost a nursing baby,
too, which was not found until ten that night. White and black were all mixed
together, and were as confidential as though related. All called to us and
asked where we were going, and many we knew laughed at us for riding on a cart;
but as they had walked only five miles, I imagined they would like even these
poor accommodations if they were in their reach.
The negroes deserve the greatest praise for their conduct.
Hundreds were walking with babies or bundles; ask them what they had saved, it
was invariably, “My mistress's clothes, or silver, or baby.” Ask what they had
for themselves, it was, “Bless your heart, honey, I was glad to get away with
mistress's things; I didn't think ’bout mine.”
It was a heart-rending scene. Women searching for their
babies along the road, where they had been lost; others sitting in the dust
crying and wringing their hands; for by this time we had not an idea but what
Baton Rouge was either in ashes, or being plundered, and we had saved nothing.
I had one dress, Miriam two, but Tiche had them, and we had lost her before we
left home.
Presently we came on a guerrilla camp. Men and horses were
resting on each side of the road, some sick, some moving about carrying water
to the women and children, and all looking like a monster barbecue, for as far
as the eye could see through the woods, was the same repetition of men and
horses. They would ask for the news, and one, drunk with excitement or whiskey,
informed us that it was our own fault if we had saved nothing, the people must
have been fools not to have known trouble would come before long, and that it
was the fault of the men, who were aware of it, that the women were thus forced
to fly. In vain we pleaded that there was no warning, no means of foreseeing
this; he cried, “You are ruined; so am I; and my brothers, too! And by
there is nothing left but to die now, and I'll die!” “Good!” I said. “But die
fighting for us!” He waved his hand, black with powder, and shouted, “That I
will!” after us. That was the only swearing guerrilla we met; the others seemed
to have too much respect for us to talk loud.
Lucy had met us before this; early in the action, Lilly had
sent her back to get some baby-clothes, but a shell exploding within a few feet
of her, she took alarm, and ran up another road, for three miles, when she cut
across the plantations and regained the Greenwell route. It is fortunate that,
without consultation, the thought of running here should have seized us all.
_______________
1 Mrs. Morgan's negro maid, Catiche.
SOURCE: Sarah Morgan Dawson, A Confederate Girl's
Diary, p. 39-47
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