Headquarters Fifteenth Army Corps,
Walnut Hills, Near Vicksburg, June 17, 1863.
My Dear Mother:
You must not doubt General Sherman's friendship for me; he
is the soul of honor, the bravest, truest, loyal heart that ever beat. Not his
to betray. I am sure he means just what he writes to you. I know, had it been
in his power, my promotion would long since have been made. It would be long
for me to explain to you the intricate machinery of an army, or the peculiar
and despotic laws by which it is governed; friendship, even from those high in
rank, avails but little. What I say of General Sherman equally applies to
General Grant; the latter has not been profuse in his expressions of
friendship, but has given me the most convincing proof that he admires,
esteems, and respects me; his verbal and written endorsement is all I could
ask. You request me to have a personal interview with him. I smile. For there
is hardly a day when I am near his headquarters that I do not see him. He never
goes to the table at meal time, when I am about, that the invitation is not
extended to me; he and his staff, with all of whom I am on the most intimate
terms, are always polite. General Grant has frequently done me the honor to ask
me my advice. My opinion upon grave matters has been taken as law by him. He
knows me very well, and exactly my position. He would be rejoiced to greet me
as Major-General, but he, like Sherman, has no power to confer rank. No colonel
in the corps, I am quite sure, has had the courtesy, kindness, consideration
and indulgence that has been granted by both these generals to me. I am very
grateful to them for that which I have no right to demand. Remember, I am
serving my country, not either of them; that the privileges of rank give wide
disparity, that aside from myself and my own claims, which, after all, are
meagre, for kind fortune has not yet given me opportunity for brilliant
achievements; there are hundreds, thousands, who have claims for faithful
service, to say nothing of those who he under the sod, or those other dear
martyrs, who, maimed and crippled, offer their bleeding bodies in testimony.
SOURCE: Walter George Smith, Life and letters of
Thomas Kilby Smith, p. 305-6
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