Headquarters Army Of The Potomac, February 21, 1865.
I told George1 last evening to write to you and
acknowledge the receipt of your letters of the 17th and 18th, also your
telegram of the 20th. The latter I did not understand until this evening, when
George received a letter from Jim Biddle, of the 19th, from which I infer
Sergeant was considered sinking on Sunday, and finding him better on Monday,
you telegraphed. George will leave to-morrow, and will take this. It is
impossible for me to go to you, unless I resign my command. If I left for a
short time, I should undoubtedly be recalled almost as soon as I reached there.
Besides, to be with you for a few days would be but little satisfaction to you;
and as to dear Sergeant,2 his condition is such that I presume it
does not make much difference who is with him. For your sake I should like to
be home, and for my own, but it is God's will, and I must submit.
My duty to you and my children requires I should retain the
high command I now have. My reputation and your interests are involved, and I
cannot shut my eyes to these considerations, however cruel may be the
conclusion that I cannot be at your side and that of my dear boy in this hour
of agony and trial. We must all endeavor to be resigned to God's will. We
cannot avert the severe affliction with which it has pleased Him to visit us,
doubtless for some good purpose. All we can do is to bear it with humility and
resignation, and endeavor to profit by it, in preparing ourselves, as I believe
my beloved son is prepared.
Dear Margaret, let me rely on your exhibiting in this, the
greatest trial you have had in life, true Christian fortitude. Bear up, in the
consciousness that you have ever devoted all the energy of a tender mother's love
to check and avert the fatal disease that is carrying off our first born; all
that human power could do has been done. Our boy has had warning, and not only
his good life, but the consciousness that he knew and was prepared for the
change, should sustain us in that parting which had to be encountered one day,
for we all must die in time.
George will tell you all about me.3
_______________
1 Son of General Meade.
2 Son of General Meade.
3 General Meade left headquarters at 12 o'clock
noon, on February 21, for Philadelphia, and arrived there at 10 P. M., on the
23d. Before General Meade had reached his home the newspapers announced the
death of his son Sergeant on the 21st instant at 11 P. M. General Meade left
Philadelphia at 11 P. M. on the 26th for the army, having been hurriedly sent
for by the Secretary of War.
SOURCE: George Meade, The Life and Letters of George
Gordon Meade, Vol. 2, p. 263-4
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