Showing posts with label Dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dreams. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Brigadier-General Thomas Kilby Smith to Elizabeth Budd Smith, May 27, 1865

Saturday, May 27th.

Enclosed herewith I hand you the only copy of Mobile paper I can procure; the details therein will be sufficient without further comment from me. To-day is deliciously cool, too cool for comfort without woollen clothes. My little boat has just arrived, bringing me cargo of chickens, green peas, string beans, cucumbers, blackberries, sweet potatoes, and peanuts, with beautiful bouquets sent to me from Mount Louis Island, a blossom or two you will find pressed.

I cannot say what my future will be, a resignation would not be accepted, inasmuch as I have a full major-general's command, and I am in uncertainty as to the day or hour when I may be mustered out, or ordered hence to another field. It is only left to me to be patient to the bitter end. There is a growing disposition through many parts of the country to pay more honor to the base rebels who have been conquered in their efforts to overthrow the best government in the world than to the brave defenders of their flag. It will not be long before the United States uniforms will cease to be a badge of honor. How base the treatment of Sherman, how nobly he has emerged from the fiery furnace. I dare not trust myself in speculation upon passing events, or anticipation of the future.

I rejoice to note by the price current that most of the staples of life are largely reduced in value; corn, oats, flour, etc. You will now be able to make your dollar purchase pretty nearly a dollar's worth, and thus your income be virtually increased.

I am not much in the habit of telling dreams, and there is no Joseph to interpret; but three that have been lately dreamed, are so peculiar in connection with passing events, that, without giving them in full detail, I will let you have the outline. The first dream I dreamed myself about the time of the assassination of the President, and it was to this effect; that General Canby sent for me to be the bearer of despatches to President Lincoln, and that I went to heaven to deliver the despatches. You will naturally ask how heaven appeared to me in my dream. I can only give you a vague idea of my impressions. The scene was a spacious apartment something like the East Room of the White House; but vast with shadowy pillars and recesses and one end opening into space skyward, and by fleecy clouds made dim and obscure, just visible, with a shining radiance far away in the perspective, farther away than the sun or stars appear to us. I have no remembrance of my interview, but a clear recollection of my sensations that were those of perfect happiness, such as I have never had waking or dreaming. I would not tell this dream to anyone, till some weeks afterwards the Provost Marshal of my staff told me of a strange dream in which he had awakened the night before, and that had made a serious impression on his mind. The scene of his vision was laid at Carrollton, near New Orleans. I was standing surrounded by my staff, Jemmy Sherer and Joe, when a man approached and asked me to retire to the back yard on plea of private and important business. I walked out with him and a moment after a rebel officer followed us, with his hand upon a pistol, partially concealed in his breast. Mrs. Stone, the wife of my Inspector-General, called the attention of the dreamer to this fact, with a solemn warning that I was about to be assassinated. He at once sprang to the door for the guard, and perceiving an officer in command of an escort approaching, called halt, that from him he might procure the guard, but as he neared, discovered he was escorting a long funeral procession of mourners clad in white, in the centre of which was a hearse with towering white plumes. A colloquy and quarrel ensued, and pending the denouement he awoke. He told his dream to me, and on the instant, my own being recalled to mind, I told him mine, but neither of us mentioned the matter to others. Lastly, the Adjutant, Captain Wetmore, had his dream. The march and the battle, and all the vicissitudes of the campaign, in the rapid kaleidoscope of thought, had passed through his brain, when at last Jeff Davis appeared, a captured prisoner, then he was indicted, tried, and convicted, all in due course, and finally the sentence, that he be banished to “Australia” for twenty years, provided the consent of the British government could be obtained thereto.

These dreams were all vivid and interesting in detail, the last the most sensible of the three, and certainly as easy of interpretation as those of the butler and the baker of the King of Egypt. Yet they only serve to remind us of the words of him, who wrote as never man wrote, who knew the human heart, and springs to human action, and the world, and all its contents, better than anyone on earth,

“All Spirits,
And are melted into air, into thin air;
And, like the baseless fabric of this vision,
The cloud-capp'd towers, the gorgeous palaces,
The solemn temples, the great globe itself,
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve;
And, like this insubstantial pageant faded,
Leave not a rack behind: We are such stuff
As dreams are made of, and our little life
Is rounded with a sleep. . . .”

My next letter will be dated from New Orleans, events transpiring, foreshadow my early departure from my headquarters at Dauphine Island, to which I have become a good deal attached. I have had some lonely hours on its shores, but the waves have made sweet music in my ears.

I have some fresh accounts of the horrid accident at Mobile; language fails to do justice to the terrors of the scene. The professional sensation writers will fill the columns of the daily press with details, and I will not attempt to harrow up your soul with my tame pen.

SOURCE: Walter George Smith, Life and letters of Thomas Kilby Smith, p. 403-6

Friday, August 8, 2014

Robert Gould Shaw to Sarah Blake Sturgis Shaw, December 25, 1861

guard-tent, Second Regiment, Camp Hicks,
Near Frederick, Md., 3½ A. M., Dec. 25, 1861.

Dearest Mother, — It is Christmas morning, and I hope it will be a happy and merry one for you all, though it looks so stormy for our poor country one can hardly be in a merry humor.

I should be very sorry to have a war with England, even if we had a fine army, instead of a pack of politicians for officers, with their constituents for rank and file; and all the more so, of course, thinking that we shall have to take many “whoppings” before we are worth much. War isn't declared yet, but doesn't it look very much like it to every one at home? Here, we have made up our minds that we shall have much more soldiering to do than we expected when we started. I think we may as well consider ourselves settled for life, if we are to have a war with England!

My Christmas-eve has been very much like many other eves during the last six months. On the whole, I have passed quite a pleasant night, though what our men call the “fore-part” of it was principally occupied in taking care of two drunken men (one of them with a broken pate), and in tying a sober one to a tree. After this was over, I did a good deal of reading, and, towards one o'clock, A. M., had some toast and hot coffee, — having previously invited my sergeant to take a nap, so that I might not be troubled by hungry eyes, and made to feel mean, for there wasn't enough to give any away. The drummer (who with the sergeant of the guard, for some reason which I never discovered, sits and sleeps in the officers' tent) kept groaning in his sleep; and I couldn't help imagining that his groan always came in just as I took a bite of toast, or a large gulp of coffee. This diminished my enjoyment; and when he suddenly said, “Martha, there isn't any breakfast!” I was certain that my proceedings were influencing his dreams.

It began to snow about midnight, and I suppose no one ever had a better chance of seeing Santa Claus; but as I had my stockings on, he probably thought it not worth his while to come down to the guard-tent . I didn't see any of the guards’ stockings pinned up outside their tent; and indeed it is contrary to army regulations for them to divest themselves of any part of their clothing during the twenty-four hours.  . . . Merry Christmas and love to all.

SOURCE: Thomas Wentworth Higginson, Editor, Harvard Memorial Biographies, Volume 2, p. 196-7

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Brigadier-General Thomas Kilby Smith to his sister Helen, January 1, 1864

Headquarters First Brigade,
Fourth Div., Seventeenth Army Corps,
Department Of The Tennessee,
“Camp Kilby” 1n The Field, January 1, 1864.
My Dear Sister Helen:

The weather in this neck of woods has been most charming, warm and balmy, until night before last, when after a most terrific rainstorm, the full benefit of which your brother received, riding that day forty miles or more, the wind changed to the north, and suddenly there came a flurry of snow followed by freezing and most bitter high wind. I never felt more intense cold anywhere. I don't know the condition of the thermometer, but everything about me has been frozen up, ink, ale — everything that will freeze — and to-day, although the sun shone bright, there was no sign of thaw. It is by far the coldest weather I have experienced for more than two years. It is exactly a year ago to-day since we withdrew from “Chickasas Bayou,” within six or eight miles from here after one of the severest contested battles I have been in. I little thought to be here, that day, now. It has been a year of remarkable events to our country and to me.

I send you a few old books that have been my solace in many a weary hour past; don't scorn them because they are old. “Old wine, old books, old friends,” you know — and each one of them I send you has a legend to me, associations that make it dear, and, therefore, for my sake, you will keep them as a little more precious, giving all of the family who wish a taste of their contents, for they all have intrinsic worth; you will note a memorandum in some from whence they came, etc.

For a whole month past I have been in the wilderness, so I can write you no stirring story. I left a life in Natchez that almost realized a fairy tale; this could not last long, and on some accounts I am glad it is over. I am again in the front, though it was pleasant, while it lasted, to sit in '”fayre ladye's bower.” I wonder how you all look at home. I have hoped for cartes, but I suppose it would be expecting too much from the enterprise of the family. I wonder if I shall ever again see any of you. Almost every night I dream of the dead, of father, and Walter, and Charlie. One or two nights ago my dream was so vivid. I thought I woke with Walter's hand in mine. Can it be that the dead watch over the living, and come to us in dreams; I sometimes think that this is true, and that for every friend we lose on earth we gain a guardian angel. I hope our dear mother is well and happy. I can see by her letter that in my children she renews her youth. She has had many and sore afflictions, but bears a brave heart. You must all do everything in your power to smooth her pathway. I have met many women in my experience of life — many beautiful, witty, sweet and lovely, some who thought they loved me — but never any woman like our mother, never any one with so many graces of mind and body.

SOURCE: Walter George Smith, Life and letters of Thomas Kilby Smith, p. 347-8